A Nigerian marriage counsellor, Bisi Adewale, has cautioned women against travelling abroad alone for prolonged “omugwo” duties, warning that such extended stays could strain marriages and leave elderly husbands vulnerable.
Adewale, founder of Family Booster Ministry International and the College of Marital Success, issued the warning in a video posted on his Facebook page on Monday.
He frowned at situations where women spend years abroad assisting their children with childcare, arguing that such arrangements often disrupt family balance back home.
“Another thing I strongly disapprove of is a woman travelling to Canada to do omugwo for three years. It is not good at all. A 75-year-old man should not be left alone at home at that stage of life,” he said.
The cleric said he had personally agreed with his wife that they would always travel together if the need arose to assist their children abroad.
“I told my wife that wherever our children are, if there is omugwo, we will go together. And I have also told my children that if accommodation is an issue, I will pay for a hotel nearby,” he added.
Drawing from medical illustrations, Adewale stressed the importance of spousal presence at every stage of life, noting that dependency patterns change with age.
He said, “When a child visits the hospital, the doctor asks for the mother. When an elderly man is in the hospital, the question often becomes: where is his wife? That shows the place of a spouse in life’s journey.”
The counsellor also cautioned men against domestic violence, warning that mistreating a wife in youth could have long-term consequences in old age.
“When a man is young, the wife is like a companion. As he grows older, she becomes his caregiver. By old age, she is practically his nurse. So abusing your wife in your younger years is self-destructive,” he said.
He further urged couples to embrace mutual care and companionship, stressing that marriage becomes more dependent on emotional and physical support in later years than in youth.
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